we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
Randomize
