yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
Randomize