absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize