ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
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