...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
Randomize
