he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
Randomize