You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No...this little piggys going to the bar
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
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