If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
When he brought me into his room he showed me his James Bond calendar and matching sheets, and then told me that his goal in life is to be James Bond….epic fail. Mission Impossible. I was scared to take off his boxers to find out that they were also James Bond themed.
RUN LIKE YOUR JAMES BOND
Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
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