And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
what the fuck happened to the tacos
Randomize
