I cockslap morals
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter...
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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