Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
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