Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
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