Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
Randomize
