So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
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