I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
Randomize
