He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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