i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
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