So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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