Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
Randomize
