try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
Randomize
