the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
Randomize