Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
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