just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
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