i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
