the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
Randomize
