would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
Randomize
