it wasn't lemon gatorade
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
Randomize