i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
your all-time low pick up line was when you asked a girl "Are you rock-staring at me?"
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
Randomize
