There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
Randomize
