It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
Randomize