Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
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