I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"