I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Randomize