she looked like the bat from fern gully.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
