I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize
