so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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