My nipple is on Facebook.
so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
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