spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize
