There is no way he is gay with that hair.
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
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