and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
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while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
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I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.