Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
if i died would you start the facebook group?
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
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