Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
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