He is such a slut. More and more my type.
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
Randomize
