Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
Randomize
