thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
Randomize
