yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
Randomize
