I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
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I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
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Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
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