There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
Randomize
