we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
Dear Mark, please dispose of your crusty mcdonalds napkins used to jerk it at my desk
discrete masterbation is a lost art
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
You know you suck at relationships when you are sitting in the airport on Christmas day, alone, swiping on Tinder.
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
Randomize
