Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
I have aggressive nipples.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
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