as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
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