You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
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